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Home > Articles > The Anger Workbook > Step 8

The Anger Workbook

by Dr. Les Carter & Dr. Frank Minirth

Step 8. Hold your defenses to a minimum; trust your healthy assertions.

Identifying Fear

Fear implies hesitancy, apprehension, and doubt. It is an emotional governor that inhibits us from living with full-throttle confidence. It sets the stage for many dysfunctional behaviors and attitudes. But it does not always have the image we expect.

Most of us identify fear in overtly weak characteristics such as shyness or cowering or intimidation. Certainly, those qualities have strong elements of fear. But fear is not one-dimensional. It can be expressed by unrealistic bravado, excessive talking, workaholism, and lying, to name a few traits. Fear is the inner insecurity that inhibits us from living in the healthy ways we know we should.

To get an idea of the ways fear may exist in your life, check the following statements that apply to you.

I feel antsy or uncomfortable when I am not in control things.
   
I have been told I dont receive others feedback well.
   
There are parts of my personality no one knows about.
   
Sharing intimate feelings or personal thoughts with others is not natural for me.
   
Sometimes I use humor to avoid delicate subjects or I change topics quickly.
   
The moods of ther people can have a strong effect on my moods.
   
I have a habit of letting my frustrations fester inwardly; I dont let go of them easily.
   
I have been known to tell lies to cover up flaws or to keep from being accountable.
   
When someone is clearly angry, I habitually seek to cover my flank.
   
I worry more about my public image than most people would suspect.
   

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