What
is Anger?
According to Hendrie Weisinger, Ph.D., there are five
interrelated dimensions all operating simultaneously in
any angry situation. These dimensions include:
• Cognition -
our present thoughts
• Emotion
- the physiological arousal that anger produces
• Communication
- the way we display our anger to others
• Affect
- the way that we experience life when we are angry
• Behavior
- the way we behave when we are angry The
way you communicate is the primary determinant of whether
the person you are interacting with will listen and
think about what you say, be indifferent to it, or,
argue against it. If you want to reduce arguments, and
have your position heard and considered, whether at
home or at work, the bottom approaches should be avoided.
People tend to resist communication, argue, or perceive
conflict when the other person:
• Offers sympathy that seems false or lacking
in understanding
• Pressures a person to change (opinion, position
or as a person)
• Appears to want to blame rather than fix
•
Provides unsolicited advice
• Appears to be trying to create guilt in another
• Offers reassurances that are hollow or not based
on reality
• Communicates using "gloss it over"
positive thinking
• Clearly wants to "win" by proving
someone wrong
• Comes across as infallible (in their own mind)
• Uses excessive dramatic language and histrionics
• Uses certain kinds of "hot words",
words and phrases that have a heavy emotional connotation.
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